It’s been a long week that, thankfully, kept improving after Monday.

It’s been a week of lots of deep breathing.

It’s been a week of change. Both externally and internally.

After my supervisor had a one on one meeting with my library’s director, I was assured that I wouldn’t have to worry about working on Saturdays in the near future. Branches had already been in the process of working out accommodations for folx prior to Monday. I will be able to work at another branch on Mondays.

It seems that some higher ups were trying to punish my supervisor for being very vocal during manager meetings and pushing back against directives that aren’t well thought out. My manager also has a child and relies on Saturday as a family day for family time. My situation apparently seemed to be collateral damage.

As if life isn’t hard enough during this pandemic.

I know this country can do so much better. We are capable of doing great things when we care enough to try. At least we have been taught so and tell ourselves so. But this pandemic and our antiquated political system sure seem to be getting the better of our country these days. I know I’ve had my moments this week where I just want to throw my hands up and scream until I can’t anymore.

But there is beauty and compassion as well. And there are people who care. And I am one of them.

I wrote a review of a great children’s book I recently finished reading for my library’s website. In it, I mention how some books want to be read. Well, on Tuesday when I was working on reframing my bad news from Monday, another book caught my eye.

I know that at some point I want to work for myself. But until I get there, I don’t plan to waste my precious time in trying to find a new job. That doesn’t mean I want to continue working for bad leaders though. So I will see what I can learn from this book that caught my eye as I was walking by the biographies on Tuesday. I’ve already read some words of wisdom that apply to me and I’m barely twenty pages in.

And thankfully, not all of the leaders I work with are bad. They all are humans trying to survive a pandemic and not necessarily using all of the mental bandwidth and resources available to them. But they get paid more. And I think some of them should be trying harder, or stepping down.