(Or where I am in this moment).

There’s a place a couple of houses down from where my friends live (and where I rent the apartment in the back) that has come up for sale. Ever since seeing the sign (sometime in August), I’ve allowed thoughts to wander towards what if it was my place.

It’s a garden/ nursery. My limited knowledge of nurseries is that many of them go out of business. Apparently, this one has been in business for a long time – based upon what my friend has told me and she’s lived here for over fifteen years.

I moved to NY to be closer to my family. My mom is elderly and not doing well. My brother is mentally ill. When my mom dies, I want to be closer than over 2,000 miles away.

This move has been the start of trying to figure out where to re-locate. Relocation is not just about being closer to family, though, it’s also about getting out of a climate precarious area where I don’t really have any roots.

I love the Sonoran Desert and I believe it loves me as well. But I have also loved the coastal redwoods of West Sonoma County and the Olympic Peninsula. And I am feeling the need to return full circle back east.

I had originally been thinking of relocating to the Finger Lakes area of NY (based upon pictures I’d seen on the internet and reading that cities like Rochester and Syracuse were losing population to places like AZ and TX). I figured real estate would be more affordable there. But I can’t afford to travel that far right now to see it.

Some pieces of my life’s puzzle of getting out here fit perfectly into place. Having a job and a place to live line up in the couple of weeks before leaving Tucson was awesome. Yet I’m still working on another major piece, which is paying for everything and finding another source of income.

But what if I shouldn’t even be thinking about up north? What if this is the place? Real estate is not inexpensive here, but does it need to be? I’ve been trying to do a lot of mindset readjustment towards money this year; I still have a ways to go. What if a possible path for me is two doors down from where I am now?

If I ran that place, it would not just be a nursery. I have a ton of ideas of how I’d transform it to make it mine. Local bookstore, outdoor cafe, music venue, and plants (but not just the kind that you can pick up anywhere).

Who knows? I am trying to stay open to possibilities…